Growing Pains.

Black Canyon National Park

Ahh. Summer is upon us here in swampy south Florida.  The days are long and hot and the thunderstorms come around each afternoon on the reservation just like clockwork.  All I want to do is float motionless in a cool, turquoise pool or take a long drive through the middle of no where with the windows down and the wind whipping my hair.  Summer is here.

Summer has never been my favorite time of year.  I mean, of course I loved summer vacations, who doesn't?  But summers never stirr my heart and soul like autumn and winter do.  Since becoming a real live grownup, I think summers have turned into challenging months for me.  It usually seems to be the time of year that I get my growing pains.  Things just don't sit right and I tend to question my routines, goals, and myself.  Do you ever have those times? 

The past few weeks I have been spending a lot of time in my adult education class called "Life".   It is hard and exhausting work.  But I'm learning new things about myself and others.  I'm learning more about kindness and empathy.  I'm learning (or re-learning) that I can only control myself and my actions.  I'm learning that I need to show love and appreciation more.  I'm learning to be more gentle.  I'm learning to speak my mind.  I'm learning that with a small pep talk, I can do almost anything.  I'm learning that I thrive on quiet time. 

About a month ago, Bobby and I headed back to Colorado for some family time and to celebrate my best friend's wedding.  Bobby's parents took us over to the Black Canyon National Park one afternoon, over near Gunnison.  If you are ever in the area, you must go.  It was breathtaking.

I took a few minutes alone and stood against one of the overlook railings, looking down at the almost 2,000 foot drop below me. My knees felt like jello and I took a small step back.  The cool wind whistled through the canyon and you could hear the Gunnison River roaring below.  It was so beautiful and intense that I couldn't help say a prayer of thanks for such a remarkable landscape.  

My sister and I talk regularly about the power of nature.  Its nothing new, and for thousands of years people have known the transformations that the world around us can have on our souls.  With just a few simple moments quietly looking into this canyon I was rejuvenated.  And so I'm learning this summer that a happier me is one who has taken a few minutes in a busy day to be still.  To reflect on what is beautiful and good.  To appreciate the wonder of our surroundings.  It helps put the drama of the day into perspective and to realize that everything will be A-okay.  These growing pains can be painful, but they are so necessary.  

Ok summer...I'm ready for you.